I'm gonna look fine in 2009

Well, here we are on the eve of another new year. I seem to be doing the same thing this day every year...writing out my ridiculous list of resolutions that I keep for 3 days tops, then falter and give up. I also come up with a lame theme to my new year; some sort of psychological motivation I pray will keep me in line. Hey...I thought my title above was pretty catchy, isn't it?

Here are a few I can remember from years past:

It's not too late in 2008.

It's gonna be heaven in 2007.

I've got a lot to fix in 2006.

If I could spend as much time and effort on actually going through with my resolutions as I do with coming up with my theme, I might just be successful, ya know?

So, I've been thinking about it, and I'm going to make a revolution this year, not just try to abide by some half-assed list of resolutions I'm not going to stick to. Like quitting smoking? I will. One day. But I'm not going to go all crazy like I did last January and quit cold turkey, and immediately gain 15lbs. I'm going to gradually wean myself off.

I'm quitting pop. For the most part. (Or soda for my southern readers. Or isn't everything just Coke down there?) As it stands right now, I have maybe a can or two of diet a day. I'm going to try and cut that down to a can or two a week. Everything in moderation. This includes energy drinks. I'm way too dependent on Red Bull and other crap like that. I love them, but I'm sure they aren't very helpful when it comes to weight loss. I'm going to make water my friend (more so than it is now, and I try to get 100oz in a day as it is.) I'm going to shoot for a gallon a day. If you need me, I'll be in the bathroom.

I'm going to stick to my own healthy eating plan. Low fat. High fiber. Lean protein. More fish. Complex carbs, and not a ton of them. I'm tired of trying every new weight loss fad out there...paying $40 a month to sit in a meeting and use somebody's scale. For those out there who have found success with that...congrats. I just can't waste $$ on that reason. I'm also going to continue working out as I do, focusing a little more on cardio. I signed up for a new gym today with hours that better accommodate my schedule (and I don't have to elbow the old ladies out of my way to get to the elliptical!) I'm also going to spend 25 mins walking on the treadmills @ work during lunch every day. I spend too much time sitting on my ass all day...it's the least I can do. When I lost that 100lbs a few years back, I was constantly on my feet, and I know that helped tremendously. Here's to healthy eating and exercise in 2009.

Drinking. I'm going to stop. Drinking so much. It doesn't help. It's actually a poison your body tries to heal itself from...and how can I be physically up to par when I'm poisoning myself with alcohol every weekend? Like I said, everything in moderation. I'm sure I'll have a few beers every now and then...but I'm going to majorly cut back. I'm old. I can't handle it as well these days.


I'm also going to post weekly pictures of myself with weight loss updates. And I'm going to give #'s. I'm tired of hiding from what the scale says...hiding it from myself and from others. I stepped on today and it said 276.6. Yes, you read that right. That's two hundred and seventy six lbs. At one time I weighed 330lbs. A year after that I weighed 226lbs. So here I am, 1/2 way from where I started from. It can be done.


(276.6LBS ON 12.31.08)

(Yes, that is a Kermit the Frog cup in the background. Only the finest for us!)

Well kids, I need to go get ready for my rousing evening of dinner and bowling. Christ...you know you're getting old when you actually plan a New Year's Eve around bowling. And I'm listening to Celine Dion right now.

Somebody shoot me.

=)

Great minds think alike.

Oh Christmas. How quickly you come and go. You build up this great anticipation for days...months even. And then in a flash, you're gone.

But not without some hilarious memories you leave behind.

Was it Jonah receiving a gift of a t-shirt that states "I like drinking beer?" Close, but no.

Could it have been a rousing game of Loaded Questions, complete with me having zero grasp on the entire concept of one single question? Perhaps.

The highlight of my Christmas was the gifts.

Picture it. Cicero IL. 2008. Everybody is suffering from turkey and eclair cake hangover. It's gift time.

As usual, the kids (the youngest "kid" is my brother, turning 21 in a few short weeks) pass out the gifts. Once everything has been passed out, we usually open from youngest to oldest...but this year we switched it around. As us "kids" were sitting on the floor, eagerly awaiting our turn, Matt turns to me and says:

"Kelly. I think we got each other the same gift. Feel yours."

I grab my gift from Matt and feel it. Eerily enough, it does feel very similar to my gift to him. We decide that when his turn arrived, we'd open those two gifts simultaneously.

Oh my god. We got each other the same gift! Oh the laughter that ensued.

I guess Matt and I share some weird, cosmic, cousinly connection. We were "The Two Stupid Cousins" @ school...I suppose that's to blame! =)

Here are a few other pics from Christmas for your viewing enjoyment:


(Jonah and his "I love to drink beer" shirt.


(Jack's new pans. Gross in comparison to our old ones, aren't they? That's YEARS of BBQ's! Years, I say!)


(En route to Christmas.)


(Matt and his "Hi. I'm Mat. doormat.
My dad actually asked if it came in other
names.)


(Yep. Just what Jonah needed.)

We had a great Christmas this year...despite 1/2 the family either being a) sick, or b) in Ireland...oh yeah...or c) falling down on the ice upon leaving. Ok fine, that was just me.

Merry Christmas everyone!

I bought new boots.

I've always had a love/hate relationship with boots. I love them...and think they're cute as hell. I hate them, because I have man calves. I'm not exaggerating. I measured mine tonight (before I ordered them) and my frickin' calves are 18" around. 18 inches of pure muscle. It's frightening. If I ever have to wear a knee length dress or skirt and wear heels with it, I look like a drag queen from the knee down.

My calves = manly.

Let's hope these puppies fit over my beastly mountain-esque muscles.

Which ever crazy bastard wished for a white Christmas..

You got it.

Now are you going to come shovel my driveway?

Tuesday was a good day.

That's right folks. I, Miss Kelly, got accepted into the Graduate Program @ Northeastern Illinois University! All of those months of studying for those crazy tests paid off! Needless to say, I was thrilled to walk in from the ridiculous snowstorms to see some good news awaiting my return!

I also got to see my grades for my first semester:

STRAIGHT A'S!

I'm off to a much better start that I was @ NIU. I believe I failed two classes my first semester there? Talk about a bunch of slacker 18 year olds! Oh well...those were some of the best times of my life. Well worth the wasted $$!

I am now officially one step closer to being out of cubicle hell FOREVER! The thought is SO exciting, I can't even begin to put it into words. Especially these days. We received an e-mail from HR last Friday letting us know that we would be required to take unpaid time off the week after Christmas. Doesn't that just put a candy cane in your stocking?

So...I'm going to have nothing but free time from December 24th until I take my happy ass back to work January 5th. That's 12 whole days without that place. Despite the fact that I won't be paid for two of those days, I'm thrilled. I haven't had a full week off in something crazy like 4 years. I'm long overdue.

Well, I'm off to do my favorite thing now that I'm on Christmas break: nothing.

..and speaking of creepy pictures.

I just had to post this. I don't know why. Just felt compelled, I guess. I'm random like that.

I'M DONE WITH THE SEMESTER!!!

...and boy do I have some reading to catch up on!

PS

You should be proud of me. This my 4th post in the past week.

Remember this picture? It still cracks me up to this day.

So I should be working on my take home final right now.

And I will be.

Soon.

I promise.

But some news first.

I PASSED THE ILLINOIS TEST OF BASIC SKILLS!!!! WHOO HOO!!! =)

The testing center was posting scores at 5pm today, but I just couldn't wait. Being the impatient type (surprise surprise) I logged onto the site, hoping they'd let us early birds cheat. And they were. But you needed your id # they issued during registration to obtain the results. So I logged into my e-mail, and they had sent me the scores already. (Yeah, at like 12:30 this afternoon. I'm glad I didn't check then...I would have been COMPLETELY unproductive for the rest of the afternoon!)

So I open the e-mail, and it tells you your score (out of 300) and what a passing score is (240). I got a 268. And passed! I let out this little scream in the office and yelled out "I PASSED MY TEST!" to which my co-workers started clapping, though most of them had no idea what I was talking about. They're pretty much used to me shouting out obscenities and other fouled mouth expletives at random times throughout the workday...nothing should surprise them now.

I've overcome the hardest obstacle thus far. Phew.

Now, I wait.

So I made a bet with my doctor today

I had to go in for my annual "womanly exam" this morning, and of course, the topic of my weight came up. (I'm sure you were all dying to hear that, eh?) I have to give my doc props though...his approach is very tactful, and he allows me to do most of the talking. He doesn't scold or criticize, and offers very helpful suggestions.

So, we were talking about how the pill isn't as effective in women over 200lbs. Duh. But I digress. So I made him a bet. I told him that when I go in for my exam next year, that I will be down 60lbs. He seemed rather shocked at the number I proposed, and said he'd be happy with 30.

So here it is. December 1st 2009 I will have lost 60lbs.

I told Jonah about the bet, and he said he'd give me $500 if I could lose 40lbs by then. Of course, I have to pay him the $500 if I lose. And we both agreed to pay in installments...as we're completely poor like that! =)

1 day down, 364 to go. Think I can do it?