The importance of "Me" time.

I've been feeling like total and complete shit lately. I've been convinced that I have a brain tumor...diabetes...high blood pressure...Hell, I even went so far as to look up things like Lyme Disease and Bell's Palsy. Sad, I know.

I took the day off from work on Friday the 15th, and went to see a new Primary Care Physician. He wasn't quite what I was expecting...a bit of a fast talker. But there was something about him I liked...I think it's the fact that he didn't coddle me, but still listened to what I had to say. We talked for a few minutes...he looked in my ears, eyes, throat...took my bp (which was normal, by the way. I have no idea how I have normal blood pressure, but I do.)...and sent me on my merry little way...to the referral office. I received a referral for bloodwork, as well as an MRI (to rule out the brain tumor I'm convinced I have....but deep down inside know I probably don't). As I sat there in Karen's office, I looked around at her numerous "Cat Lover" objects, and thought to myself, "God...I hope my cube doesn't make me look this lame." But I digress.

The labwork was no problem...but the MRI is a different story. Insurance has to approve you for this...you can't just go walking in all willy-nilly (like that?) and get your brain scanned. I couldn't help but sit there and think about "Sicko," the documentary by Michael Moore. If this thing were real, which I'm pretty confident it's not...but I have to rule it out, just for my own piece of mind...I could die in the time it's going to take my insurance company to aprove this test. Or not approve it. Who knows? Sad state of affairs in the country. But I'll save that for another post.

So, the doc called me this morning with test results.

Damn...I'm healthy. No diabetes. Thyroid is normal. (I'm always hoping for that one to go haywire...)...even my cholesterol is great.

So now we just wait for this MRI approval.

In the meantime, I'm pretty convinced these headaches and crazy face-tingling episodes are just stress. Extreme stress, but stress, all the same. How do I know that, you asked? I finally FINALLY took some much needed time to myself this weekend. I was supposed to go to Jonah's Saturday night...but I just couldn't find the motivation to get up and go. So I told him I was going to stay home and relax. And that I did.

In fact, I never even got dressed on Saturday. I did my laundry...did my taxes...completed an art project...and even looked through some old photo albums. (And in the process, gained some much needed motivation for my weight loss struggles.) To say I had a selfish evening would be an understatement...but sometimes you've just got to take one. I feel so much better, and I'm so glad I spent the weekend alone.


Now if I could just get rid of that pesky job (and be independently wealthy of course...).

Thanks for listening.